The ultimate Parenthood goals are making sweet memories while raising orderly human beings.
Sometimes…. Ok, most days, things don’t go according to a parent’s plans. Being on time, the whole family fashioning a good look, owning a home that only needs cleaned once a week, and kids that never whine. These are what parents’ dreams are made of!
Social media perceptions can sometimes cause moms to be extra insecure. No one really talks about the struggles.
However, if you use Twitter, you’ll read several relatable, sarcastic, and entertaining tweets about parenting. Instead of questioning what you’re doing wrong in your home, you’ll feel right at home.
There are really too many good tweets to pick from. Out of hundreds, these 10 are among my favorites!
1. Perfect-ish Family
All the parents standing around at BBQ’s and parties.
Nothing brings me more joy than the family I constantly complain about.
1. Wash 2. Forget to move to dryer 3. Rewash the now smelly clothes 4. Move to dryer 5. Repeat steps 1-4 6. Dry both loads together 7. Rerun dryer for wrinkles 8. Move to basket 9. Fail to fold 10. Move back to dryer
I think it’s safe to say that no one is the perfect parent. And any given day even the most motivated mom or dad can try to plan for the perfect day. But we’d be fools to expect a mess-free, whine-free, energetic, fun-filled non-stop 18+ years.
At least we have Twitter to share our experiences with. But these hilarious parents’ daily struggles just crack me up!
If you don’t stay at home with your kids, you probably have your own assumptions about the gig. Some look down on stay-at-home moms while some admire SAHMs. Let’s clear a few things up!
According to Forbes, staying home is popular among millenials for a variety of reasons. The gist of it is that mothers are looking to swap working away from home with work at home opportunities or “pinching pennies.”
In the article, “How Much Does Child Care Cost?”, Care.com states that 32% of families spend over 20% of their annual household income on child care. According to this source, the cost of child care deeply impacts families ranging from parents changing careers to parents not being able to afford it.
I’ve been a Stay-at-Home-Mom now for over 6 years. In that time, I’ve worked very hard at preparing our kids for preschool and maintaining the household. All while needing to defend myself. As if moms already need to be judged any more for the way we raise our families! Popular beliefs or myths are pretty much the only thing separating what others think goes on, and what it’s really like!
10 Myths About Stay-at-Home Moms
10. It’s easy
It’s true that SAHMs don’t have to rush to the babysitter to drop their little ones off for work, spend a majority of the day away from their families, and rush home to get dinner started. However, the challenges of keeping a bunch of kiddos entertained all day, cleaning the house while it gets wrecked, and still getting dinner on the table is no easy feat!
9. SAHMs don’t have degrees or a higher education
Even degree-holding moms have to make an important decision. Follow career or press the pause button. Higher education doesn’t always equal higher pay in the career field. Sometimes the logistics of staying home are for personal reasons, and sometimes it’s a matter of cost-effectiveness.
8. No dreams and aspirations
Very much like #9, moms who stay home have long term plans. We know our families won’t always need us in the same way. We look forward to our futures and checkmarking items off of career goals or bucket lists.
7. SAHMs are wealthy
The occupation is manageable with an average family. As long as the one income can meet the needs of the family, staying home is sustainable. In the long run, there are sacrifices of luxury in order to focus solely on the needs of the household. SAHMs budget, budget, budget!
6. SAHMs are lazy
Assumptions are made that SAHMs aren’t busy and that they sit around all day. But truth be told, trying to keep a bunch of kids out of trouble, fed, bathed, entertained, and off to bed is hard, busy work. Isn’t is true for any mom that once you sit down your kids need something?
5. Mom does all the parenting
Some people believe mom does (or should do all the housework) and child care because she’s not making an income (even when dad’s home). In all fairness, moms are built to nurture their families. But moms are built to be a team with dad including sharing chores, handling bills, and both parents being equally involved are all important.
4. Always home
One of the main things SAHMs do is drive their families around. Doctor appointments, errands, to and from school, someone to show up at school events, to and from extra cirriculars like sports, play dates, visiting grandma, the library, birthday parties, etc… similar to the working mom.
3. Don’t contribute financially
The VeryWellFamily.com says stay-at-home moms would be paid 143,000 per year if paid for all of their services. If the budget is still tight after all those savings, Moms have more opportunities to work out of home. Some legit jobs include writing, photography, coding, transcribing, sales, and more. Currently one trend is to sell essential oils or teeth whiteners, all while staying home with the kids.
2. Not stressful
We may be flexible when it comes to time management. However, one of our biggest stressors is budgeting everything well and coming up with alternatives (for projects, activities, and meals). Sometimes a project or trip will have to wait if it can’t fit in the budget. Staying at home can also be tough on a mom’s social and emotional needs.
1. Always love our job
If you can happily do anything while sleep deprived, then go you! But for most parents, we’re tired, our job never ends, and we’re also really good at judging ourselves. Sometimes that gets in the way of enjoying the job.
Who works harder?
Not all jobs are equal. And not all families are equal.
In the end, we’re all the same. Working moms and Stay-at-Home-Moms face similar challenges. We’re facing issues with our kids listening to us, cleaning up after themselves, and having them finish homework. We’re tired, we’ve repeated ourselves one too many times, and we we all just wish life was a little easier.
Working mom or Stay-at-Home Mom, we love our families more than anything. We’re all really just doing what we deem best. Over all, our families depend on us, whichever path we choose.
Mother’s Day is a big deal for us moms! Afterall, many agree that becoming a mom brought purpose to our lives.
While Moms appreciate gestures or gifts, what most of us want is even more meaningful. A day to feel special. A day to really feel like our families appreciate us.
Maybe a day to sleep in, not lift a finger, and good behavior. No cooking or cleaning. No changing diapers. No going anywhere. Just sitting out in the sun with a drink in hand. Being surrounded by our families. Sounds nice to me anyways! 😀
Every year since our oldest has been in school, the teachers have helped the kids make Mother’s Day gifts. These are by far my favorite! In preschool, he painted wooden cutout flowers. This year, the kids worked on something even more simple that really touched my heart!
They made giant construction paper cards with one side devoted to painted hand-print flowers. The other side is “All about Mom.”
The close-up reads:
“Let me tell you about my mom.
My mom is 32 years old.
She likes to sit on the couch.
The best thing she cooks is eggs.
Her favorite food is Chinese food.
Her favorite thing to do to relax is to sleep.
We like to spin together.
She is really good at cleaning the house.
As you can see, my mom is special because she plays with me.
His answers are pretty close anyways. Definitely had me smiling because it’s so cute!
As a Mom, this is special for so many reasons. I love his little hand-prints. And I love that he took time to think about why I am so special to him. This masterpiece made my week!
Like many moms, I struggle to feel like I’m doing a good enough job.
No matter how much moms do for their families, often, we feel like we aren’t good enough. It’s so hard to keep up with it all. It’s no wonder!
We balance school, work, chores, extra circulars, church, marriage, family time, health, emotion, routines, fun, and hey, even the checkbook. We have all the in between jobs from driving the kids to the doctor, and making sure everyone has clean underwear. We multitask so much that we can’t even remember what we accomplished all day. Meeting our family’s basic needs consist of so many extra steps that are forgotten about like putting a meal on the table. I mean, I can’t be the only mom who plans out a grocery list all week, and plan dinner starting in the morning hours.
Thinking back to my childhood, all I remember was playing and having fun. I remember my mom showing up to every baseball game. Every school event. Every appointment. She made time to play toothfairy. She read us so many books. And with that excited narration too! She admired our works of art. Made our beds. Cleaned the house in any bit of free time she had. She balanced everything, with what appeared to look like a breeze. And somewhow she was amazingly patient with us. All. The. Time.
And when I became a Mom, I thought, “well if she raised 4 of us, I’ll certainly do fine with less kids.” With three little boys, I look at my mom now, with a much deeper appreciation. Now I experience the restless nights, worrying about a fever when the kids are sick. I worry about balancing second chances with discipline. I worry when I’ve forgotten show-and-tell or a special dress-up day at school. And I worry if I’m giving all of the kids equal attention and meeting all of their emotional needs. And how on Earth do you squeeze in that extra time with your spouse to let them know you still care?
Moms have such a hard job! We face so many challenges, even our own thoughts and feelings. So stop putting yourself down. You might not be the perfect mom you always thought you’d be. But look at what you do in one day. Look at what you’ve accomplished.
You are the kisser of boo-boos, the tickle monster, the dance partner, the snack attendant, the potty train praiser, infant interpreter, the pusher of swings, dignified driver, the walking “why” responder, the artist appreciator, the mountain of laundry climber, and so much more!
If only you could see yourself in the eyes and hearts of your family!
Gift your mom something really nice for Mother’s Day to show her how much you care! Then let her know how special she is and how much you appreciate her often!
Here’s a quick video on the topic of how mom’s view themselves VS how kids view their moms. It made me cry, so be sure to have a box of tissues nearby!
The job of a parent (especially a mom) is a hard one and has been for all of time.
Our shift starts when the kids wake up to the time they are (actually) asleep. And then we’re on call in the middle of the night and early mornings. Our brains run at super speeds all day. Then in order to rest for the night, we have to actively stop thinking and worrying.
We face challenges that leave us feeling helpless and out of control. And then we continue to blame ourselves for still not doing a good enough job.
Do you feel this way?
To the Mom who needs strength to get through the week,
Your family is your entire world. It began very intimately in a way that made your heart whole. It was love at first sight. Soon these tiny people you love grew. They became independent from you and that was frustrating. Life started becoming chaotic. You could never just sit down and relax.
And you struggled a bit.
You struggled to be able to complete your to-do list; because you’re only one person and the to-do list is endless. You struggled in the ways of disciplining your children; because after all, comforting our kids comes more natural to us. You struggled to be heard; because your kids would rather play and have fun instead of listen to their parents. And you struggled to remember who you were before this beautiful family; because now this family is all of you.
I know you feel weak because you think that compared to other moms you aren’t doing as good of a job. You feel like you don’t live up to what your family needs. You continue pouring yourself into your family’s cup.
Have you ever stopped to think about just how much you do? It’s no wonder you’re stressed out, anxious, and tired! You give all of yourself, even when your cup appears to be completely dried out.
There is only one ‘you.’ No one can do your job like you. You were selected by our creator to be a mom for many special purposes. How amazingly awesome is that? That the same creator who created something as beautiful as a coral blazing sunset and microscopic fingerprints on the hands of your unborn baby, has also created you!
Your time on Earth is temporary. And even more so temporarily, is your time raising your children. I know, I know… every time I hear this, I cringe too. It feels like forever! We’re not that perfect, always-smiling, always together family, like you see on Instagram!
We have our moments! Parenting is hard for both moms and dads!
That is why we need to be strong! Life is threaded together.
Your whole life, your whole marriage, your whole family, and everything that makes you who you are, are woven together in this thread of life. And if life begins to put too much pressure on us, the threads begin to fray, and finally snap.
And it’s natural for some parts of our life to fray. And pressure is natural. But the whole thread can withhold any pressure, with one key thread. This thread is in the center of all of the other threads. It is core. That one, is faith in God.
And if you really want to be a strong parent. A strong mom. Because I have seen a lot of strong women in my life- I can tell you, it’s because they have faith.
These amazingly strong and influential women have shed sweat, blood, and tears over their families. They are often times the people who have lost a lot, but continue to feel blessed.
These women pray over their families and friends like it’s their job. And you know when one of these women have prayed for you, because something in your life just changes. That’s because a mother’s prayer is (what I feel) probably the strongest, most emotionally involved prayers.
So, friend, if you need strength to get you through the week (or even just till the end of the day), your mother’s prayer will be heard. God will help you get through the week, whether you pray for 5 seconds, or hours through the night.
If you need extra energy, pray for that too. It’s worked for me in some of my most sluggish days. If you feel you have no control, seriously, hand it over to God.
Strengthen the core of your life.
You can do it, Momma!
I will say a prayer for all of you who read this. If you’d like a special prayer, “like” or comment below.
Please share with your Mom friends (who especially need strength)!
When you’re routinely running low on fumes, is it possible that you need a bigger change? Do any of these 3 areas of your life sound like something you could work on?
Over the past year or two I’ve noticed a huge change in myself. I went from the kind of Mom who would create with our son; play dough figures and paint pretty pictures. I would take him on trips to the playground. We danced a lot together. And we were always laughing together. I was the fun Mom!
And then I became a Mom of 2 more amazing little boys! My heart was so full of happiness that we all had each other. I didn’t realize I could be so in love.
….Then one day the baby was mobile. And soon they all decided that things in our house are more fun if they’re flying through the air. And messes are good. The messier, the better. And who doesn’t love a rowdy boy? I mean, if Spider-man can climb walls, why can’t they?
So, I grew tired. There is still only one of me (when my husband goes to work). Some days I want to beg him not to leave me here with all the craziness. But I don’t.
It took me a long time to realize that there is no magic fix-all for any of that. But, I needed to fix my weary self. And I knew other tired Moms need to as well. So I created the 21 Day Challenge on my Facebook page, Mommas Group. This challenge was created to help tired Moms to become positive, energized, and reconnected. And over all, the goal is for you to feel rejuvenated.
All you need is 10-20 minutes a day minimum, or more if you need it.
The 21 Day Challenge is split up into 3 weekly smaller goals:
Week 1: Positive Mind
Week 2: Energize Body
Week 3: Reconnect Spiritually
Week 1: Positive Mind
Be positive (Let go of the Mom guilt)
Get help (Chore charts & teamwork)
Organize (A clean and clear house allows the same in your mind)
A big portion of us being tired is trying to do too much. Although have the world’s greatest intentions, we compare ourselves all the time. So let go of Mom guilt! Things change, and we just have to “go with the flow.”
Then, write a to-do list and divide that baby up! You can do it!
Small kids: pick up clothes and toys and dust
Preschool-aged kids: wipe table, chairs, cabinets, appliances, and windows
Kindergarten-aged kids: sweep, mop, vacuum, take care of pets, make their bed
Older kids: clean the toilet, wash dishes, and fold laundry
And lastly, clean up social media and emails (opt out of those subscriptions causing you to be distracted and unfriend negative people). Then organize an area of your house that really needs attention. It may just free up that nagging feeling every time you see that mess!
Make sure you’re putting nutritious food into your body. And swap out the juice and pop for water. Keep healthy snacks on hand like almonds, berries, apples, carrot sticks, cut up celery and cucumbers…. Making simple switches can dramatically change how you feel.
Enjoy a detox bath with essential oil and epsom salt (only try this once this week, while drinking plenty of water). 20 minutes of exercise per day will get your blood circulating and release endorphins, which is alsoo a plus. You’re looking for a good sweat, though, to detox. Make sure to hydrate well!
No skimping on sleep either. You need 7-9 hours! According to sleepfoundation.org, the right amount of sleep can regulate your mood, hormones, immune system, and also improves cognitive function and memory. Still tired? Take a 10-20 minute mid-day nap to freshen-up!
This is probably the most important week. Try one of the many different types of meditation. Also, set aside some quiet time for thoughts and focus.
You may also read daily devotions. I have a book called “Jesus Calling,” which I feel that I can apply to my every day life. And even more straight-forward- you can and should set aside some time for prayer. Even enjoy Christian music or movie!
These should all guide you into a stronger spirituality, which will then make you a stronger Mom. I mean, who is able to always handle stress on their own? It’s nice to turn to faith when we are feeling extra blessed, and sometimes when we are desperate!
Want to start your 21 Day Challenge for rejuvenation?
If you feel that you’d get the most from combining all 3 weeks tasks throughout the whole 21 days (instead of split up week by week), then feel free to choose items off of each list that would be challenging and helpful.
Example of how to combine all for 21 days:
List positives & Do something for yourself
Drink more water & Rest for 10-20 minutes mid-day
Read Daily Devotions & Listen to Christian music
Set aside 10-20 minutes of alone time in the morning, mid-day, and evening.
Morning: read daily devotional, while getting a head start on drinking water
Mid-day: rest 10-20 minutes, list positives in life
Evening: Take a bubble bath while listening to Christian music
You don’t have to be a tired Mom any more. Sometimes you skimp on what you need because of what your family needs. But a Mom who has been taken care of, can also take care of her family.
*I am not a doctor. Please always consult with your physician first to address mental or physical health needs!
You love your family so dearly. No one else could ever love them like you. From the moment you knew you were expecting your entire life changed. You were cautious, you were always at the doctor, you had to eat a certain way, you swapped out your favorite wardrobe, and you could feel everything emotionally and physically that bonded you to your baby.
Now your baby is a full of curiosity, abilities, and a big personality. You look forward to seeing their bright little smiles first thing in the morning. You love having a chat that the both of you can understand. You love when they bring something to show you. Or the times when they climb into your lap and snuggle, even for a minute.
But lets face it, as your kiddo(s) gets older, and gain independence, things start to get tricky. They try to rewrite the rules. They think your standards are up for negotiation. They forget their manners. And when they get hungry or tired, their emotion comes out like hot lava.
So for the less memorable parts of your every day, when you feel that you are coming unglued, know that you are doing just fine.
The days when you literally slept 5 hours overnight and you cried like your 2-year-old. The days when you had to yell to get your kid’s attention because you needed to be heard. The days when you are so tired of feeling like you are putting in your all and watching it get shredded apart. The days when you feel lost as a person because you gave everything up for your family. You gave so much, you feel mentally worn out.
You ask yourself what you did wrong. What happened?
The answer? Nothing. You changed. You grew as a parent. And you still wildly love your kiddos. Just because you have needs, doesn’t make you any less of a parent.
Get more sleep. (You need 7-9 hours of sleep according to helpguide.com). Don’t forget to eat. Healthy food. Often. You need your family to respect you. To hear you. You need them to chip in around the house. And you need to do things for yourself.
Do something for yourself, even if it seems silly. You deserve it!
Crank up your favorite Pandora station, pick up an old hobby, go see your best girl friend, go shopping with your mom and sister, have that glass of wine at the end of the night. And do not feel guilty about doing those, even if the house is the same disaster that it’s been all day.
Raising kids is hard. And not hard in the fact that we don’t think we can’t do it. Hard, in the fact that we feel that we can’t be the parent we want to be.
Stop comparing yourself to who you want to be. Look at what you have overcome. Look at your special relationship with your family. And just know that you are doing just fine. Really.